Insight Meditation

In Buddhism the tool of insight meditation is called vipassana. Vipassana means to see penetratingly, with discrimination. It is a tool to effect change within oneself to make life more happy and peaceful. Vipassana is used to reprogram the mind to think more skillfully for our benefit and welfare. It is the ability to see things exactly as they are.

Vipassana is best done immediately after a period of mindfulness of breathing meditation (anapanasati) to calm the mind down and to get rid of the noise. As an analogy, imagine that OCD is safe in harbour but there is a stormy sea raging between us and that harbour. It is out of reach of us and thus hurls its obsessions and compulsions at us from its base of safety. Practicing anapanasati is like calming that storm down so that we may sail to that harbour to challenge it on its front doorstep.

To use a computer analogy, suppose that we have to fix something deep down at the BIOS level of our computer. What we have to do is to reboot the computer. This shuts down the high level operating system, so that we can gain access to the BIOS to do our work. The BIOS is the fundamental input and output system which affects all areas of the computing experience. Practicing anapanasati is like the process of rebooting the computer and vipassana is like programming the BIOS. In vipassana meditation, we have to go to a similarly deep level in the mind to do our work to bring about change from within.

So, after we have calmed our minds down with anapanasati, we are ready to begin vipassana. Up to now, our focus has been on our breathing. Now we begin to observe the whole of our experience, both bodily and mental. Our job is just to observe without interfering, without augmenting or diminishing anything. Our role is that of the "Impartial Spectator" as described by Dr. Schwartz. Whatever thoughts that arise in the mind, whatever sensations that arise in the body, subtle or gross, pleasurable or discomforting, we just observe with equanimity. Equanimity means without showing like or dislike for that which arises.

As we observe, we keep in mind the three characteristics which I spoke about yesterday of anicca (inconstancy), anatta (ownerlessness) and dukkha (unsatisfactoriness). As we observe a thought, whether it is an OCD related thought or not, we think "yes, this too is inconstant; this too is not me, mine or my self; this too cannot be counted on for satisfaction". In the beginning, you may have to express yourself in words like this silently to yourself, but with time, you will just label all thoughts and sensations simply as "Anicca.., Anatta..., Dukkha...".

Why do we do this in terms of the three characteristics? Why don't we cut straight to the chase and go with "OCD can go get lost! OCD can go get lost!"? Well, for one reason, if we get rid of one thing, we must have something to replace it with. If we shout out for OCD to go get lost, then our brains will throw its hands in the air and say "ok, so if no OCD, then what?". Nature abhors a vacuum, so does the brain. Secondly, down at this level, the brain has great difficulty distinguishing between what is OCD and what isn't. Its native language is feelings and perceptions, this is not the cerebral cortex we're dealing with here. Telling our mind at this level to pay no attention to OCD will evoke a response like "OCD? What does that feel like again?". And that is the problem in our lives isn't it?

This is why we use anicca, anatta and dukkha. These three concepts are like pieces of kryptonite to hang around the neck of OCD's superman. We may not be able to kick OCD's butt directly, but the kryptonite will do the job for us just as well. So we have to observe anything which arises, both physical and mental as anicca, anatta and dukkha. This is because as I said before, the deepest levels of the mind cannot clearly distinguish between what is OCD and what isn't and also the boundaries between what is physical and what is mental also start to blur into each other at this level. Therefore, we must directly see anicca, anatta and dukkha in all things which we observe in our meditation.

Due to the low level at which vipassana works, these new ideas will start to permeate automatically into all areas and aspects of our conscious existence higher up. We will begin to understand from a deep level what the true character of our experiences are. Then in daily life, when obsessions and compulsions appear, we will realise at a deep level that they are impermanent in nature (anicca), not originating from us (anatta) and that we will derive no satisfaction from acting out compulsions (dukkha). Then OCD will die a thousand deaths every day. One day it will be utterly beaten. May that day be soon for all of us. As a by-product of our work, we will find that all other areas of our lives are enriched by our new wisdom and that the rest of our suffering and stress in life is either reduced or eliminated as well.

You will not see the benefits of meditation overnight. It must be done regularly and consistently for as long as it takes. Ideally you should set aside a quiet period once a day away from your normal duties to practice. Practice will bring benefits almost immediately however as has been demonstrated by countless people all over the world for thousands of years. I totally believe that it will too for us OCD sufferers.

It would be good if you could read some more information about vipassana. Also of interest may be this online interview which Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz gave in which he talks about vipassana. Though you can begin your practice by reading instructions, it would be a good idea to seek the guidance of a qualified teacher on a course. Here are a couple of links to some vipassana courses, there are many others in this country.

Dhamma Dipa Vipassana Meditation Centre
Amaravati Buddhist Monastery

I have been to the first one twice now and I intend to go to the second one soon. Please remember that if you are suffering from clinical depression or a debilitating mental illness such as this, then please consult a medical professional before embarking on a meditation course. Otherwise, there is no harm in trying this out for yourself to see if it can help your condition.

Metta,
John